Cheat Codes and Atomsk and h4XXorz, OH MY!
by Third Attack of B-side
Summary: Shinji lost his code book! Who has it? Chapter 4 OK!
1. d00d

========  
  
This is funny.  
  
Keep in mind this is only my second fic. My first?  
  
I wrote it three years ago. And only two paragraphs worth.  
  
About pokemon. Yea. That's bad. But read on.  
  
I got better. A little...  
  
You know the drill, I don't own the stuff I don't own, Ok?  
  
[Should be interesting]  
  
========  
  
ME: Ok. This takes place during the first episode. CUE THE MUSIC!  
  
bum,bum,bum,bum,bum,bum,bum,bum,buuuuum,bum,bum,bum,bum,  
  
da,na,na,na,na,naaaaaaaaa, NA, NAAAAAA, NAH...DA NA,NA,NA,NAAAAAA NAAA NAAA NAAAAAAH!  
  
(You know...the Angel Attack Theme? Ok, ok, ill stop now.)  
  
*DOOM*  
  
Shinji:!!???  
  
Here we see our favorite angst ridden protagonist hiding in an ally.  
  
The noise of the the onslaught against the angel was too much. Each time a  
  
missle hit...each time the vulcans were fired, it sent another chill down his spine.  
  
Shinji:DANG-IT!! Im sick of this! Where in the heck is Misato!?  
  
Out of nowhere Shinji takes out a Strategy Guide.  
  
Shinji:Lets see...according to this...I DIE!?!? Then...some chick named  
  
Asuka gets my....E...va...gel... uh...  
  
Shinji Scratches his head, trying to pronounce the strange word...  
  
Shinji:Well Judging from this picture, it looks cool. Can't let this "Asuka" have it  
  
hehehehhehe....  
  
*Flips Guide to the Cheats section*  
  
(Meanwhile, Dammit)  
  
Here....we see Misato leaning against her car, drinkin a bud. Suddenly, as if  
  
on cue, she gets an idea!  
  
Misato: I have an idea!  
  
So she takes out her cell phone...  
  
(At nerv, room where they are monitoring the angels rampage)  
  
Kaji: Maya...Stop hogging the popcorn!  
  
A phone rings. A cell phone. Ritsuko's cell phone.  
  
She answers it and....:  
  
Misato: WHAAAAAZAAAAAAAP!?!!?!?!!  
  
Risuko: AWAZAAAAAAP!?!??!11one  
  
Fyutsuki:WAAAAFREEEEKINZAAAAP!?!?!d  
  
Haruko: WAAAAAZAAAP!?!!?!?!!!?!%%%&:-o  
  
Gendou: AHEM!!!!!!!  
  
And Just like that...all was calm.  
  
Except for the big a$$ angel going on a rampage.  
  
Gendou*stern and serious*:Fyutsuki...  
  
Fyutsuki:...Sir...?  
  
Gendou: I...have something to share with you...  
  
Now Fyutsuki has something of an "infatuation" with Gendou.  
  
It's somewhat along the lines that Maya has with Ritsuko.  
  
The only difference is that nobody knows it, Not even the commander.  
  
Fyutsuki had done a good job of hiding this. Hearing what  
  
Gendou just said caused his heart to race with anticipation...  
  
Fyutsuki: Yes...sir?  
  
Gendou: I've lived a lie. Im...I'M ACTUALLY SCOTTISH!  
  
Fyutsuki:....oh. Wait...HWAAAAAAAAAAHT?!??!?!?  
  
All people currently in the room...Maya...Ritsuko...Fonz...  
  
they all looked up at him in shock.  
  
Gendou:DON'T LOOK AT ME!!  
  
Tears start to well in Gendou's Eyes. He stand's up to reveal that he  
  
is sporting a blue plaid kilt instead of pants.  
  
Gendou:Waaaaaaahahaha!!!!  
  
And with that, he runs out.  
  
Fyutsuki:...WAIT COMMANDER!!! I STILL LOVE YOU!!!!  
  
And with that, he runs after him. And all was calm...again.  
  
Except for****EXPLOSION*****  
  
Maya: 0m9 w7f 12 7h@?   
  
Ritsuko:...I...I don't know...  
  
As you can see, Maya has a slight problem with her...brain.  
  
Long ago Ritsuko accidentally hit her in the head with a sledgehammer  
  
during a rather interesting night of love making.   
  
=Flash Back=  
  
Ristuko: Now Im the dastardly villain and you're a damsel in distress  
  
tied to the railroad tracks.  
  
Maya:...Ritsuko are you sure this is working? Im not even turned on....  
  
Ritsuko: SHHH!! You're breaking character!! Now I must nail in this spike  
  
with my Evil Sledgehammer...uhh...of doom! uh....Mwahahah!!!  
  
Maya: But...Im not even sure this is safe...Ritsuko, lets just-  
  
*SMASH*  
  
Ritsuko:...Maya, you're breaking character again! And where'd you get all  
  
of this...red......uh oh...  
  
=End Flash back=  
  
Ever since she has never quite been the same. Now...only Ritsuko can understand her.  
  
For the non-l33t people out there Maya just said: Everyone! What is that!?  
  
Ritsuko: What? Everyone! Look at the main screen!!!  
  
Everyone looks. To their surprise they see a purple figure  
  
engaging the angel. The Angel Seems to be keeling over in pain.  
  
Ritsuko:...No...it...can't be....its....ITS!?!?  
  
Purple Figure: I love you, you love me, come on let's all get Jiggy....  
  
Just then, Eva unit one comes in and kicks the purple Dinosaur in the crotch,  
  
causing it to explode.  
  
Ritsuko:...Shi...shinji!? But how!?  
  
Shinji: Level Select, Baby!!!  
  
Shinji holds up the Strategy guide, "The Cheaters Guide to Cheating".  
  
Ritsuko:Hmm....  
  
Maya: w0w j00 r 50 k3wl! 91mm13 50m3 wh3n j00 937 84ck?   
  
[Wow shinji! Your amazing! May I have some codes when you return?]  
  
Shinji:What the f-  
  
*End of part one*  
  
*Ending Credits begin as Randy Newman Music Plays*  
  
You've got a friend in me.  
  
You've got a frieeeeeeend in me.  
  
When the road looks....rough ahead,  
  
And you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed.....  
  
You just remember what your ol' pal said.  
  
Boy, you've got a frieeeeeend in me.  
  
Yeah, you've got a frieeeeeend in me.  
  
Disclaimer:  
  
Only Maya and Barney the Dinosaur were hurt in the making of this production.  
  
Maya suffered major hemorrhaging in the brain due to impact with a sledgehammer.  
  
This Resulted in Severe brain damage. By order of the Japanese courts,  
  
she now must reside with and be taken care of by Ritsuko. Barney the  
  
Dinosaur died from being kicked in the crotch by a giant robot.  
  
***That is all.***  
  
So you like? Review. Don't like? Review.  
  
If I get good one's Ill make more. And if I don't...  
  
Ill go into a deep depression followed by a Bloody Massacre.(j/k)  
  
[Just Sayin'] 


	2. Hello friend

========  
  
This is funny.  
  
Keep in mind this is only my third fic. My first? I wrote it three years ago. And only two paragraphs worth. About pokemon. Yea. That's bad.   
  
My Second?  
  
I wrote a day ago. Between playing Sonic Battle(DO NOT BUY IT!) And looking at Hentai(or WAS I!?).  
  
But read on. I got better.   
  
You know the drill, I don't own the stuff I don't own, Ok?  
  
[Should be interesting]  
  
========  
  
Shinji:Time to float like a butterfly and sting like a nuclear-powered-80-foot-tall-a$$-kicking-robot-of-doom!!...um...Booya!  
  
Misato, who had just arrived Nerv: I can tell he's new at this...  
  
Maya: j00 7h1nk!? [Definately...]  
  
Misato:...huh? uhh...yeah...  
  
And with that, Shinji jumped into the air...like some sort of...giant...olympic...jumpman...uh...guy. When the EVA unit reachedthe apex of its jump... It struck a pose Viewtiful Joe style, then, with it's leg extended, zoomed at it's target for the Coup De Grace.  
  
Angel:...Wait! Wait!  
  
The Eva was just about to strike when the Angel said this. It stopped in mid air accompained by a screeching noise.  
  
Shinji:...What!!!? You DARE interrupt me when I'm kicking a$$!?!  
  
Ritsuko: Wow, those cheat codes seem to have really helped his confidence...  
  
Angel:...Please, if you'll just hear me out...  
  
At this point, Everyone was pretty surprised. However, a talking angel is nothing comapared to what would happen next...  
  
Angel: Just...hold on a sec...  
  
At first it looked like it was molting...but as they all intently watched...  
  
Angel:...there.  
  
Ritsuko:...what the?....  
  
Misato:...is this even possible?  
  
Maya:0h 5n4p! [Oh my...]  
  
The Angel was actually a gigantic Vash the Stampede in a rubber Angel costume.  
  
Vash: Man, it sure was hot in that costume. Now, friend... wouldn't you like to discuss this over a nice cup of organic green tea, instead of fighting??  
  
The peace loving needle-noggin of Trigun fame was right there and trying to negotiate peace with a Robot built for war. Everyone was astonished.   
  
Except for Shinji. He was frantically looking through the Strategy Guide trying to find some reference for this odd turn of events...  
  
Shinji:...Ack! Nothing!? Im doomed!!!  
  
Vash:....huh? No friend, I'm here to help.  
  
To Shinji, it looked hopeless. That was because Shinji never saw the Trigun anime. So his first impression of the guy was that he looked like he could kick a$$ and take names. Just then Shinji heard the voice of his Scottish father...  
  
Gendou: Shiiiiiinnnjiiiii...  
  
Shinji: What the!?  
  
Gendou: Shiiinnnnjiiiii.....uuuuse the Haggas!!  
  
Shinji: the what?  
  
Gendou: the faaaarce!!  
  
Shinji:...huh? What happened to the Haggas?  
  
Gendou:...theee faaaaaarcccce....  
  
Shinji: Dad, why are you talking like that?  
  
Gendou:...huuuuuuuuh?  
  
In the room, everyone was looking at him again, with nervous looks on their faces. Maya started to cry.  
  
Gendou:...I...I always wanted to be a jedi...  
  
Fuyutsuki:...sir?  
  
Tears started to well in his eyes again...  
  
Gendou:Waaaaahhahahah!!  
  
And again he runs out the room...bawling. This time, instead of pants he was only in his underwear.  
  
Fuyutsuki: Wait, commander!! You'll alway be MY jedi!!!  
  
Vash: Wow, you guys have issues.  
  
And once again, Fuyutsuki ran after.  
  
Shinji: OH HECK! I'll beat him myself.  
  
Vash:...but...I don't want to fight...in fact...I have a message from Seele-OOOUUUUGH  
  
On the main screen...it is seen...that the foot of the EVA...was firmly logged...in the Gun Toting, Needle Noggin's crotch.  
  
Shinji: Shinji the magnificent wins again!!!  
  
Vash:...Why...me?  
  
And with that...the 80-foot Humanoid Typhoon...died.  
  
Ritsuko:...hold on a second...didn't he just say "message from SEELE"?  
  
Misato: I think he did.  
  
Shinji, in the middle of a victory dance: ohh ohh ohhh yeah duh duh duh duh duh  
  
Misato: Shinji! No time to celebrate yet... We have a-   
  
Shinji: NOT WHILE IM DANCING!!!!!  
  
Shinji then continued to dance.  
  
Nisato:....  
  
Ritsuko:...  
  
Gendou: Waaahhh!!!  
  
Fuyutsuki: Commander!?  
  
Vash:...x_x  
  
Kaji: I didn't get to say anything until now...*sniff*  
  
Meanwhile...the REAL angel was on Vacation in Disney World, destroying it.  
  
THE END OF PART 2  
  
===========  
  
Credits run while I song I made up plays:  
  
---  
  
Heeeeey Duuuuuuuuude....Don't feel so baaaaaaaad,  
  
In the eeeevaaaaa....you are invinnnciiibllle  
  
Get In....into the eeeeva's skin....  
  
and then go raaaampaaaage...  
  
---  
  
Disclaimer:  
  
Vash the Stampede didn't die. But since he is a pansy, instead of fighting back he went home, made some tea, and cried. Gendou had to go to the hosipital. After he ran the second time, Touji, who was there for no reason, punched him in the face, breaking his nose. Rei also had to go to the hosiptal. After Gendou took that punch, he fell over and onto Rei, Breaking her spine, ribs, and collapsing her lungs. She, however, didn't mind. At the end of the day, Disney World was destroyed. Nobody cared.  
  
Thanks for the Reviews All! I think this one is better, no? 


	3. The magnificent 3

========  
  
You know the drill, I don't own the stuff I don't own, Ok? And to those that have a problem with that I leave a simple message:  
  
"Suck an egg, you bastards!!! AHAHAHAHAHHA!!!" -Third Attack of B-Side  
  
Ahem, and now for the fic.  
  
[Should be interesting]  
  
========  
  
Shinji, still in the middle of his victory dance: I'm- too sexy for my shirt- too sexy for my shoes- I'm just too seeeeexaaaah  
  
This spectacle had been goming on for two hours. Elated over his "victory" over the peace loving Vash the Stampede, Shinji danced. And danced...and, well, danced. Ritsuko had just about had enough. You could tell because she was ripping Maya's hair out in frustration. Misato, who tried to get Shinji to stop earlier, was on the floor, spazzing out while in the fetal position while mumbling nonsense about cobras and other what-not. Fonz had gone back to America. IN A BODY BAG.*BUM BUM BUUUUUUUUUUUM* No one was happy about what was happening.(If YOU watched a giant robot dance to Euro Pop you wouldnt be either) And just as everyone was about to commit a Mass Seppuku...  
  
Mysterious figure on the building behind him: HELLO!!!  
  
Shinji, still singing: ...will allll waays loooove, what!?  
  
The Mysterious figure was in a cloak and it was hard to make out his face, as with so many other Mysterious Cloaked figures. Shinji, who was still in the EVA, was somewhat peeved that he couldn't continue his 2 hour long "Victory"(wasn't much of a victory) "Dance"(Dancing EVAs are an abomination onto all humanity and some Vulcans). However, he maintained his composure, and calmly and politely asked the figure:  
  
Shinji: WHO DA fUXX0rs ARE YOU?!?!?!?  
  
Maya's eyes gleamed.  
  
Mysterious cloaked figure:Say wuh?  
  
At that point 2 more Myterious Cloaked figures appeared.  
  
Now, Shinji would be Nervous...if the sight wasn't so comical. They all we're shaped like fast food.  
  
Ritsuko: Intresting.  
  
Maya: WTF!? [WTF!?]  
  
Misato: Cobras!!!!!  
  
Gendou:...it can't be them...  
  
The the one shaped like a soft drink held up a boom box and hit play.  
  
*click*  
  
Samurai Pizza Cats...  
  
Oooh yeah!  
  
Who do you call when you want some pepperoni?  
  
Samurai Pizza Cats...  
  
[Speedy Cerviche: Right on!]  
  
They're stepping out crime, and you know that ain't balony  
  
Cloaked #2: Uh, Shake? Dat be wrong song, son...  
  
Cloaked #1: Quiet, you sack of crap be-fo' I shove this boom box up yo'...*mumble*...*mumble*  
  
Cloaked #3:...*sigh*  
  
He hit play again.  
  
===================  
  
Cause we are the Aqua Teens  
  
Make the homeys say ho  
  
and the girlies wanna scream  
  
Cause we are the Aqua Teens  
  
Make the homeys say ho  
  
and the girlies wanna scream  
  
===================  
  
Gendou:...Oh no.....MY CREATIONS HAVE COME BACK TO KILL ME!!!!!!!!  
  
Once again everyone looks back at Gendou. Ritsuko started to sweat nervously.  
  
Ritsuko:...uh..  
  
And Misato? Well, let's just say that EVAs dance REALLY bad.  
  
Misato: COBRAS!  
  
Gendou:...I mean uh...OCH!! AYE!!..ummm...Haggas?  
  
Ritsuko: Your creations? You created over-sized talking fast-food....and a meatball?  
  
Gendou: I was bored! Geez!   
  
Gendou was bored. Between evolving the enitre human race and hitting his son upside the head while he was sleeping, Gendou didn't have much to do. Being a back stabbing super-villan and an all-round mean person, you can imagine how little friends he had. Never being invited to go to the movies or parties...or..any where for that matter, and not having much else to do, he played god in his basement. So far he's created two Yui clones, a punching bag that can punch back and curse at you, and a japanese Ronald McDonald that prides himself on ruthless efficiency and something called "Splook". Yea, and the oversized foods threatening to kill everybody.  
  
Gendou picked up the phone....  
  
Gendou:...lanuch an N2 bomb.  
  
Frylock: A what now?  
  
Shake: pfft, Whatever! Lets just get to the killing. We'll start with his son! Ahhhhahahah!  
  
Frylock pointed a fry at the the 80-foot Eva.  
  
Shake: What the...? What the *bleep* kinda hoes he been knockin'!?  
  
Gendou: RUSSIAN ONES, THANK YOU!!!  
  
Ritsuko sighed.  
  
Misato: COBRAS!  
  
Maya: 50m30n3 5hu7 7h12 817ch u9!? [Someone please help misato!]  
  
Meatwad: Uh, guys? He did just say bomb, right?  
  
Just then, we hear a Stealth bomber flying over head. Then, a whistling sound.... Then a  
  
BOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
And all was quiet one again... Well, except for the thuds of a dancing Eva...  
  
Shinji, singing: Samurai pizza cats......oh yeah!  
  
Ritsuko: SOMEBODY GET HIM OUT OF THAT EVA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
=====END!!!?!!1/one===  
  
DISCLAIMER: The Fonz is dead. No one knew how or why, And no one cared. He was annoying...saying "'eeeeey" all the time and giving people thumbs up...bastard. Misato had to be carried out to a therapist. It was there she revealed that as a child she was repeatedly bit by dancing purple snakes.(Who the h3ll writes this stuff!? Oh yeah...me) Our favorite dysfunctional Super Heroes aren't dead...they were blown back to where ever the heck they came from...but radiation from the bomb caused them to forget everything about this little episode. How convienient. For Gendou, that is. The russian hookers came to Gendou's house the next day, demanding money for some reason. Gendou blew them up with an N2 bomb.  
  
Thanks for the reviews all. Also, the next fic will have more characters in it!!! YAY! Just thought I'd let you know. 


	4. And then, the earth cried

[Summary: UH OH!! Shinji lost the strategy guide!!! Guess who has it.....]  
  
========  
  
This fic is funny.  
  
OK, a few people have asked and here is the explanation. "Fonz" (also Fonzie), is a character from a 70's television show called "Happy Days". His trademark is when he goes "aaaaaay" and gives a thumbs up(sometimes two). And as far as this fic goes...hes dead.  
  
(google image "fonz" for looks)  
  
I have, If you may, a small rant. If theres anything I hate, its the word "HUGGLES". And "THANKIES" and just about ANY WORD modified to make it sound cuter. If I hear anyone use that word again, Ill beat them to death with my cat. And believe me. He likes it more than you think.  
  
Also, I don't like this "^_^" thing. IT FREAKIN' GETS ON MY NEVRES...but not much...so...whatever.  
  
You know the drill, I don't own the stuff I don't own, Ok? And if you don't like it. Here's what you do:  
  
1.Take this fan fiction  
  
2.Shine it up real nice  
  
3.Turn it side ways  
  
4.AND STICK IT...in a 6x8 envelope addressed to me, including at most 10 things you dont like about it, and why.  
  
Thank you.  
  
[Should be interesting]  
  
========  
  
It's been hard on everyone so far. Gendou, having revealed to everyone thats he's acually a Scott and having destroyed 3 crimes against nature, Ritsuko Feeling the pressure of having to do the Brain Damaged Maya's work and now the Insane Misato in addition to her own, Kaji, sick of not getting any show time decided to start a drug trafficing operation in the basement. Shinji, having finally been removed from the EVA went back into character(whiny, apologetic, wimpoguy) after Asuka threatened to rape him into obilvion.  
  
Now, we see Gendou settling back to a bowl/plate/stick/cup/helping of good ole' homemade haggas(btw haggas is boiled sheep intestines. Yum).  
  
Gendou, halfway through a haggas:...ugh...it tastes so bad...AND YET I CAN'T STOP!*scarf gnarf much* Wait...I got it!!  
  
On that exclamation, and without swallowing his mouth full of sheep guts, Gendou exited his office...eventually, that place is big.  
  
Ritsuko is hard working and a brilliant person, but even she can't do the work of three people for long... ever since she hit Maya in the head with a sledgehammer, Maya lost the ability to do pretty much anything right, especially her job. Since this was Ritsuko's fault, she took on Maya's job as well as her own out of guilt as well as to justify stealing Maya's paychecks.  
  
Maya's condition only got worse...Her talk only became more unintelligeble, and her behavior oddened(is that even a word?).  
  
Maya: |_||\|.-34|_ 70.-|\|4|\/|3|\|7 2004 .-|_||_32!!!!!121one [Translation (You'll need it): This Unreal Tornament Game is addictive!]  
  
Game: "Die B--h!" *BOOM* *zooong* "You are the champion."  
  
Maya: |\|/|\|3|)!!!!!!! [I beat them!! Hurrah!!]  
  
Ritsuko: MAYA!!! KEEP IT DOWN!!!! Between that game saying "die b-tch" and your AND Misato's workload, I don't think I can get through the day unless I have absolute...  
  
Gendou: AHEM.  
  
Ritsuko: ...eep  
  
Regardless of past...incidents..., Gendou still commanded alot of respect from Nerv. He had 100 N2-Bombs in his basement, And he blows up stuff on a whim. They kinda had no choice.  
  
[Flash Back]  
  
Paper boy: Mr.Ikari, its the end of the month...it's time to pay for you subscription.  
  
Gendou: No.  
  
Paper boy: But...  
  
**BOOM**  
  
[And yet another time....]  
  
Shinji, 4 years old: Dady...help me with my math homework...  
  
**Faint-ish in explosion in the distance**  
  
Gendou: Now you'll never have to do homework again....MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!  
  
Shinji, crying: Daddy...you're scaring me!*sniff*  
  
Gendou:...is that so? *Gendou Slaps shinji, but thats another story*  
  
[Another Time, Nerv Germany]  
  
Some Guy: IKARI!!! We've got reports of high nuclear activity in the ocean ...you wouldn't happen to be playing Battleship with my FLEET, AGAIN?!?!?  
  
Gendou: Pfft, I was bored.  
  
*BOOM*  
  
Some Guy: You sunk my Battleships!!!!  
  
[Flashback over]  
  
Gendou: May I have your attention all.   
  
Now Ritsuko doesn't usually go "eep", but you would if you saw Gendou decked out in complete scottish duds(complete with kilt!) and a bagpipe on his shoulder. Gendou was just about to play a little irish ditty...  
  
Ritsuko: Sir, please...im swamped in work...I REALLY...  
  
Gendou: Fine. Youll find a little...BONUS... in your mail tommorrow...MWHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH....  
  
Ritsuko, sweating nervously: Uhh...sir...on second thought....  
  
Gendou:....ahahahahahah....*fart*...ahahhaahha!!  
  
Ritsuko:...uhoh.  
  
[Tommorrow Morning]  
  
Ritsuko, opening her mail: Uh oh...this one is from Gendou...  
  
"I told you i'd give you a bonus...AND HERE IT IS!!!!! MWHAHAHAHHA!!!! *fart* OOCH AYE!"  
  
Ritsuko:...*sigh* oh boy.....  
  
And then, "50 cents of third ice cream cone purchase" coupon falls out of the envelope.  
  
Ritsuko:Hmm...he...seems to have lost his touch, amoung other things... And he's become a cheapskate, too.  
  
[Back to Yesterday]  
  
Gendou:.....HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!  
  
Ritsuko:...ugh, im dead....  
  
Game: ***BOOM*** Die bi--h!  
  
[MEANWHILE!!1112@one]  
  
Asuka: SHINJI, YOU IDIOT!!  
  
Shinji:...Im sorry...  
  
Asuka: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!!?!?  
  
Shinji:...Im...sorry, it was an accident...Im sorry...  
  
Asuka:...I outta have my way with you...  
  
Shinji, sacastically: No, please don't.  
  
Asuka in a rage, kicks Shinji in the groin. Shinji keels over in pain, allowing Asuka to proceed to sodomi-- err kick Shinji in the head. WHERE IS MY MAGIC STRATEGY GUIDE WHEN I NEED IT!?   
  
[In Gendou's Office]  
  
Gendou, smiling meanacingly:...MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHHAAHHAAH...*gasp*...MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH*you get the idea*  
  
Gendou: Time to try out on of these puppies.  
  
[In the main control room]  
  
Ritsuko:...hmmm...France just disappeared from the map.  
  
Then Gendou ran in franctically screaming:  
  
Gendou: IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!! INFINITE N2 BOMBS!!!!  
  
Ritsuko: ...oh dear god.  
  
[Basement]  
  
Kaji: There is a disturbance in the force...  
  
END!  
  
Disclaimer: Too many ...silence dots....dying of...dot...overdose...*dies* Shinji died after that brief assualt by Asuka. Ristuko shot Maya in the head after hearing "DIE B-TCH!" 289 times. She then used a serum to revive Shinji after she found Asuka kicking his dead corspe. Shinji, after being revived, complained how that was the happiest he's ever been since that night a russian hooker mistook him for his dad. He then jumped out of the adjacent window. The adjacent GROUND FLOOR window. Asuka Laughed, Ritsuko sighed, and Shinji cried.  
  
***That is all.***  
  
NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BAAAAAATMAAAAAAN!!!!  
  
So you like? Review. Don't like? Review.  
  
If I get good one's Ill make more. And if I don't... I'll list your e-mail address in every porno site on the internet. I should be done in the year 10,000 if I start now.  
  
[Just Sayin'] 


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